Much of my life I have felt like a stranger in a strange land, inhabiting a place I did not belong. Most of all living out a life on earth that was very painful.
As a child I held a a unique perspective on life that was not shared by members of my family, my classmates, friends or by teachers. I knew and understood things that others did not know or understand. Being a highly sensitive child on all levels, I possessed an inherent knowing that was never acknowledged, an intuitive wisdom that was not honored. More often than I would like to report I felt “out of sync” with the rest of the world.
I quickly learned that the world I lived in could not handle the truth of who I was and the full expression of my Essence so I hid my real self. I learned early that the only way to survive was to deny the essence of my Being. I shut down and suppressed my natural gifts and spiritual abilities in order to survive and fit in with society. My light had been dimmed and my greatness had been diminished. I felt invisible.
I did not feel very comfortable being around lots of people, and tended to avoid any place where large groups of people gather, due to over stimulation and energetic overload. I felt more comfortable alone by myself surrounded by nature.
On a spiritual and energetic level I felt the pain of the conflict between my knowing and my everyday reality. My spiritual woundings were unrecognized and unhealed, and I had carried those spiritual woundings into adulthood. It was those unhealed spiritual woundings that were the cause of my angst and anguish; the cause of my discomfort with having to function in this world; the cause of my discord with being in body and being on Earth.
So much of life did not make sense to me. I tried to find my place in more traditional and conventional ways, but always felt like a failure. I was not very attached to physical things, and money and worldly possessions were not as important to me. It was hard for me to grasp why society, as a whole, placed/places more value on money, competition, dishonesty and being out of integrity, vs. cooperation, honesty, human dignity and compassion. I choose to go against the system and made my own rules, rather than “sell myself out” or “play the game”.
All my attempts to heal on the rational, intellectual and cognitive level, did not work. At times my pain was so great and I felt profoundly alone, this magnified my separation and disconnection from God.
My emotional pain resided on the spiritual, energetic, and soul level, and that is where my pain had to be healed. Through many long arduous processes throughout most of my life I found my way back to myself. I reclaimed my soul-purpose and my soul-mission on Earth. I came to fully understand that “ I am Who I am.”
As a pioneering Adult Indigo, I entered the earth toward the end of WWII when the first Indigo’s started coming to Earth. There were only a small percentage of us at that time. We came here to lay the energetic groundwork, to help take humanity to a higher level of consciousness, as well as, pave the way and make it safe for the future generations of Indigos.
The next influx of Indigos came in the late 70’s and have entered in larger numbers there after. To date they have been called Indigo, Crystal, Rainbow, and Star Children. Since the 70’s these special beings have been labeled, ADD, ADHD and/or Bi-Polar and were given medication to suppress their behaviors. As they grew up, many turned to drugs and alcohol to numb and dull the immense pain they felt. They had no choice but to cut themselves off from their “True Essence”, and purpose. Their sadness is overwhelming as many fall into darkness and fear. They shrink and disappear within themselves, and it’s not that uncommon for them to attempt suicide.
I so resonate with many of the characteristics and the emotional pain of these special beings. I like many others have being physically and emotionally abused, I speak of this in my book, “Memoirs of a Mystic”.
Inherent within each of us is a deep knowing of who we truly are and what we are here to experience and contribute. However, we focus more on what our mind tells us is true, rather then listening to our inner knowing, from our heart and soul.
These special Beings are here to wake us up, to take us into our greater reality. To take us to a place of peace love, joy, and so much more. They are calling to us to awaken out of the dream, to awaken to who we truly are.
Nameste~ Charlene
